“Bold” and “confident” are not words that I would generally use to describe myself. I tend to be a very timid, quiet, and reserved person. I often lack the ability to step out in boldness for anything.  When the professor asks a question in class, I am not the student that’s going to raise my hand and answer. When I play basketball, hesitation is my biggest pitfall. It’s just hard for me to have that kind of confidence. When it comes to evangelism and my convictions about the Lord, things are no different.

Over the past few months, this has been something that I’ve really been struggling through. I don’t know how to grow in this area. I don’t know how to simply make myself become more bold. It’s not something I can just magically make happen, though I certainly wish I could. Some might claim that boldness is an internal trait. Some are born with it, others are not. Scripture, however, would seem to disagree, pointing out that true boldness in not an internal trait at all. Rather, it is an external trait that can only be given by the Lord Himself.

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“The Lord will be your confidence…” – Proverbs 3:26

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Confidence comes not from trusting in our own abilities, but rather through trusting in the grace and mercy of our God. I’ve often thought that there was a muddy gray area between confidence and arrogance. I now know that the line between these two things is actually very distinct. Arrogance is defined by resting in our own abilities, while confidence is found through resting in God’s abilities. He is the source of our boldness. We are the source of our pride.

Conceptually this may be easy to understand, but putting it into practice is much harder. I may know intellectually that my confidence can only be found in the Lord, but in my heart I still look to myself – which leaves me lacking. I know my God is great, yet I still find myself missing the kind of gospel-centered boldness to which I am called. In the midst of these questions I’ve found myself reading the book of Philippians, and chapter 1 verse 14 struck me:

“Most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the Word without fear.”

Growing in our confidence in the Lord can start by simply watching the boldness of the millions of brothers and sisters who have made this journey before us. Think of the way Moses stood in front of the most powerful man of his time and commanded him in the name of the Lord to “Let my people go!” Think of how David danced wildly through the streets with no shame or regret because of the joy he felt in the Lord. Think of how Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego remained firm in their convictions even in the face of a fiery death. How about Paul, who faced imprisonment and stoning and shipwreck and illness and floggings? The list of men and women who walked the Christian life in boldness does not end there. It goes on and on and on. Countless have walked in the face of death and declared, “On Christ this solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand!”

Are you lacking in the confidence that comes only from the Lord? A good first step is to read the endless testimonies of our brothers and sisters who have stood in boldness throughout the centuries. There is a reason that the Church has experienced some of its most powerful growth while enduring some of its harshest persecution. We are inspired by those who will not back down from their convictions about the God who loves them so deeply. When Paul was imprisoned, the brothers around him were infused with a new sense of boldness to speak the Word. Perhaps we might experience the same sort of growth by simply meditating on the believers throughout all of history who lived lives of complete and utter confidence in the Lord.

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“By this instance we are taught that the tortures of the saints, endured by them in behalf of the gospel, are a ground of confidence to us. It were indeed a dreadful spectacle, and such as might tend rather to dishearten us, did we see nothing but the cruelty and rage of the persecutors. When, however, we see at the same time the hand of the Lord, which makes His people unconquerable, under the infirmity of the Cross, and causes them to triumph, relying upon this, we ought to venture farther than we had been accustomed, having now a pledge of our victory in the persons of our brethren. The knowledge of this ought to overcome our fears, that we may speak boldly in the midst of dangers.” – John Calvin

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Andrew Neel