“If you could go back in time and tell your 20 year old self one thing, what would it be?” This is a question often asked of the older, wiser people in our community. Younger people make a lot of mistakes. It might just be the defining feature of a young person to passionately believe they know what is wise and good, but be completely wrong. As reality sets in, we realize that we do not at all know what we are doing. Teenagers and 20 year olds are young and stupid, but oftentimes they just don’t realize it – making them even stupider. And as the years pass by, people begin to ask themselves, “Knowing what I know now, what would I tell the younger me?”
Well, I am the younger me. I don’t have the luxury of looking back on my life and seeing where all of my missteps were. I am making the missteps, most of which I don’t even know are missteps. Instead, I get to sit here and look forward to a whole lifetime of the mistakes I have yet to make – or worse still, the mistakes I am currently making. It’s a scary thought.
I am the younger me, and there is nothing I can do about it. No matter how hard I try, I will age and mature at more or less the same exact rate as everyone else in the world. This means a lot of things. It means I am going to make a boatload of mistakes. I’m going to make terrible financial decisions. I’m going to say and do stupid things for girls that I like. I’m going to get angry or sad about things that in the end don’t really matter all that much. I’ll be a part of, and even cause, useless drama. The self-consciousness about the simplest, most meaningless things will reign much of my decision making. I’ll say, do, and think stupid things with all the passion in the world. Sadly, passion does not make for truth. So overall, I’ll say, do, and think things that I will one day come to regret. Some of these will be things that we all laugh about a few years down the road, while some others may lead to various kinds of destruction in my life. This time in my life is a time of tremendous change and a lot of struggle. As a result, I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that 20 years from now I’ll wish I could go back in time and tell myself something important to help make this journey a bit smoother.
Unfortunately I can’t do that. So here I am, with all the pressure of the world telling me that my entire life will be decided by the choices I make over the next few years. Literally, it feels like if I decide to eat cocoa puffs for breakfast tomorrow morning instead of waffles, it could be the difference between becoming an overweight homeless man with no friends; or a handsome, rich, CEO with a loving family. It’s overwhelming. But take a breath, young person. It is not our mistakes and failures that define our future. It is God who carries us through this crazy life. It is His tender hand which will guide us on our path.
“Guidance, like all God’s blessings under the covenant of grace, is a sovereign act. Not merely does God will to guide us in the sense of showing us His way, that we might tread it; He wills also to guide us in the more fundamental sense of ensuring that, whatever happens, whatever mistakes we may make, we shall come safely home. Slippings and strayings there will be, no doubt, but the everlasting arms are beneath us; we shall be caught, rescued, restored. This is God’s promise; this is how good He is.” – J.I. Packer
This is a time of mistakes…but its also a time of opportunity. You only get to be young once. Take advantage of the time. It’s a time you will never get back. It’s a time of countless laughs, spontaneous trips, and crazy adventures. Don’t be afraid to take risks and enjoy this time in life. These kinds of things, if done wisely, are truly honorable and good. Don’t miss all the memories and friendships you can create during this pivotal time. It’s a time that has the potential to be a lot of fun. But, young Christian, it’s so much more than that. It’s an opportunity for good. Don’t fall into the trap of believing that your younger years of freedom are wasted if you aren’t partying night after night, having as much sex as possible, experimenting with drugs, and literally risking your life over stupid ideas. Don’t confuse innocent fun with detrimental sin. And don’t confuse innocent fun with what really matters: living each day before the face of God. You are so free as you navigate these waters of young adulthood. Don’t waste them. Use them for good. It will be so much more fulfilling than any kind of “fun” the world has to offer.
Young me, this is a time of mistakes. It’s a time of failures. It’s a time of wrong decisions and broken relationships and moments that will make you feel stupid. It’s a time of a lot of different things. There is one thing, however, that it’s not. It’s not the end of the world. There is hope, as Christ molds you and shapes you into the man you are called to be.
This isn’t a call to take the sin of your youth lightly. This is not an excuse article. Far from it. It’s a call to fight…but to fight with your eyes set on Christ, the sovereign Redeemer who will be faithful to finish what He has started. This is a call to hope, as the struggles of today will one day fade. The mistakes of your youth are not meant to drag you down into a pit of despair. These very mistakes are meant to drive you to the cross, as you throw you burdens at the foot of Christ. There is no worry which is too small for His caring heart.
Helpful resources:
Teen Tip: Life Has Losers and You May Be One of Them (Rick Thomas)
Teen Tip: Finding God in Your Mundane Life Will Change Your Life (Rick Thomas)
Don’t Waste Your Life – Download (John Piper)
Dear Younger Me (MercyMe)